August 2020 Newsletter

Sending you strength and calm as we all endure the situations brought to each of
us by COVID-19.

“Dementia Mini Series” Part 6
Don’t Lecture!

Welcome to the sixth in the series focusing on talking with a loved one who has short-term memory loss. Learning communication tips will help make the time together successful.


Dealing with repeated questions on the same topic is often frustrating for you…and for your loved one. We know they don’t find anything in their short-term memory file drawer so they have no recall that they just asked that very same question often minutes ago.

“Where are we going?” “Where is my dad?” “Please take me home.” These are examples of some of those repeated questions. Our first instinct is to give them details to bring them back to our reality. To us we think we are helping, to them it sounds like a lecture with the main message “You are wrong.” Often the result is frustration all around.

This challenge requires that you first take a deep breath … then here are some examples of simple responses:

“Where are we going?” Answer this with where you are going and stop there.

“Where is my dad?” Try bringing up a good memory about their dad such as “I was thinking your dad raised lots of cows.”

“Please take me home.” A simple “Tell me the greatest thing about your home,” often works well.

Bottom line——don’t give them tons of information which looks like a lecture. Give it a try. It can make for a much calmer day for all.

If you haven’t had a chance to watch my video about Talking with People with Dementia give it a look. If you have already seen it and found it helpful share this link.

Click here for YouTube Video

Have you seen this?

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Diana and her Mom Iona